Sunday, May 1, 2011


After a 36-hour marathon of rest, muscle relaxers, and heating pads...I'm actually feeling better. There is still a cranky knot in my shoulder but it's mood is quickly lightening. There was a point, at the hight of the pain, that I'd convinced myself that I was doomed, my life as I knew it was over, and I was going to end up a hunched-back, bitter old woman stuck in her house. The children in town would talk about me and would dare each other to knock on mean-old Mrs. Barrett's door. I also imagined myself with whiskers, wearing a pink muumuu and weighing about 400 pounds. It's amazing how quickly bad goes to worse in my head. Thankfully, my imagination helped me to feel better when I looked upon the reality of my pitiful self in the mirror.

I really don't like taking drugs but when your in that kind of pain, you're willing to let somebody shoot you in the head. I figured taking drugs was a little less dramatic and not nearly as messy. I took 3 muscle relaxers in the span of 24 hours, more than I would normally take in a years time. About 10:00 pm, I had a small glass of chardonnay, went to bed and slipped into a coma. Emma woke me up about 4:00 this morning because she still thinks it isn't safe for her to jump off the bed by herself. I helped her down, attempted to let her out to potty but she just wanted a drink of water. Getting up in the middle of the night to attend to Emma's needs is something I've gotten quite used to. I'm actually surprised when she sleeps all night long. But she loves me and I love her and I'm sure, if she could, she'd help me off the bed, open doors for me and bring me fresh water to drink.

Laying around, resting on the sofa gives a person lots of time to catch up on television-watching. Instantly streaming movies to the TV via Netflix is among our favorite ways to watch whatever we want. I've added lots of movies and TV shows to our instant queue (pronounced, kwee, if you're Kyle Barrett). I've managed to watch about a dozen movies since yesterday morning. I also watched 3 episodes of The Judds and I'm pretty sure I'm hooked. One of my biggest accomplishments has been beating my high score on Tiny Wings. It was quite a victory.

Since I've felt better today and have a lot more range of motion in my neck and shoulder, I made a pot of stew, a batch of chocolate chip cookies and did some laundry.

I skipped church and I feel really bad. Probably because I ate cookie dough.

I hope tomorrow I can go back to business as usual because this stinks.

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