Yesterday was weird. I was confused more that usual. I know myself pretty well and misplacing things and daily confusion are just part of my life. But, I stood at the kitchen sink for a good 30 seconds trying to figure out which way was hot and which way was cold on the faucet. I seriously for the life of me couldn't discern this simple thing. It could have been the lack of food, or it could have been the detoxifying process, like maybe a caffeine molecule became lodged in my memory bank while it was exiting the building. Whatever it was, it was just a wee bit unsettling. Most of the day I was riddled with a headache, not a bad one, jut an irritating one (and apparently one that rendered me a vegetable).
Speaking of vegetables, I've also not reached that place where I'm craving them. In fact, I'm having to chug the juice now and hope I don't barf it back up. Today I put some cilantro and parsley in my juice to give it a different flavor. It helped but I'm just not enjoying this right now. Surprisingly, I'm not hungry and I feel ok. Just ok. I feel a little bit joyless. Not mad, not sad, just not really really anything at all. I am kind of tired and running around in circles, not staying on task...oh wait, that's normal. Typically, I get a rush of happiness when I'm walking and a really good song comes on. Not one song made me happy today. I was quite indifferent about even the peppiest ones.
So, I'm still plodding along and wondering why I'm doing this to myself. I may have to rethink this whole thing if I don't start feeling better soon. What I'm afraid of is coming off of the fast and gaining a bunch of weight. According to the Wii, I've lost 4 pounds. I was actually at 178! While this makes me happy that I've made progress, I'm still grappling with the fact that I'll have to start eating again in a week and, what's going to happen then? I will be coming off of the fast slowly and eating mainly veggies and lean protein, but somehow I'm afraid of what this will ultimately do to my body. I'm praying about it and reminding myself that Jesus fasted 40 days and 40 nights and that I need to just commit myself to the discipline of this and let God worry about the rest. Keep praying for me because I'm very discouraged that the title of this blog is only day 3! This is really going to be a challenge.